The Shadow

I was sinking in the depths of the murky waters. In the darkness, I felt a heavy rock tied around my ankle. I tried to scream, but no sound came out. I untied the knot as fast as I could. The knot became lose. I swam up towards the surface, desperately gasping for air.

I floated in the middle of the oasis. The full moon shone radiantly across the empty desert. The waves were pushing me back to shore. A darkness overtook my vision. A voice, a strange low voice, took over my vocal chords. I struggled against the shadow, thrashing in the water.

My hands were squeezing my throat as I tried to breathe.

“Let me take over,” the shadow self said. “Or I will drown you.”

My hands tightened around my neck as the colour of the moon faded from white to red.

I woke up on a white bed, fully nude. I jumped. I did not know how I got here. My hair was dripping wet. There was a red rope mark on my ankle. My neck felt swollen. I covered myself up with my blankets, only to notice there were two masks on the ledge of the bed.

There was a white and black mask, Venetian masks.

My Rainbow Wings – Post Munch Metamorphosis

There is a Chinese saying that one lives through four stages of life, just like the seasons of the year. I lived as a young caterpillar during the spring of my life, in an empty state of consumption and learning of knowledge. I lived as a formless cocoon in the summer, pleasing everyone wishes and what they expected of me in the society as a faceless soul in the sea of capitalism.
 
In autumn, I was a hungry greedy caterpillar. I chewed on leaves after leaves, full of greed. I consumed and consumed, growing in size, as I ate from day to night. Like a greedy child who was never full despite the amount of candy, his mother gave him.
 
In an enclosed cocoon state, in a blank state. My identity was formless like water, yet it sparkled like the fragments of a broken diamond. My shiny cocoon insulated me from the winter. It made me turn a blind eye to who I was, inside, as I lived in a half lie and half truth.
 
In the half-life, I was living in my dreams that one day I would emerge as a Butterfly. I would conquer the skies with my rainbow wings, and find my lover in the lush tropical forest, and flutter into the skies towards dusk.
 
In my half-truth, I was nothing but asleep. Life past by slowly like a film in monochrome black and white. I would drift through life like a floating leaf in the sea, not reacting, but just observing and being engulfed by the waves… sinking into the depths without a choice.
 
In my half truth and lies, I wore a white and black mask.
 
When I wore my white mask, I tried to seek for the one to liberate my soul from my dreamlike state. I begged and prayed each night, for someone to save me from the dark night of my soul. I needed help. I felt I was sinking into the ocean depths, and I could not wake up from this terrible dream. I was nothing but a mess of self-pity, that had no reprieve. I craved to submit and worship the one and only one true Master of my desires.
 
When I wore my black mask, I tried to seek for materialistic needs. I needed more of everything – bags, clothes, houses, holidays. I needed the world at my feet. I wanted to control the minds of minions. I wanted to be worshipped. I wanted everyone to serve my every desire to be at the top of society, as I look down, mocking at the little pathetic minions. I would amuse myself with their antics as I chewed on a bittersweet dark chocolate, enjoying the pleasures of life under the starry skies with a slave kneeling by my feet.
 
Of course, they were both half truth and half lies.
 
I wanted to emerge from my disillusion. But I did not know how. Did I need someone to save me? Or do I need to save someone? I was lost.
 
I stumbled upon a munch. A munch. What was that? A hamburger outing? To my curiosity, it was for people who were like me. Those who were living in their cocoon states, waiting to emerge as butterflies.
 
At the local munch, I met others with their rainbow wings, glittering under the lights in their full splendour. They were happy and high. They were soaring in the skies, accepting each other with tenderness. Their passionate voices were calling out to my soul to emerge, to join them and fly towards the skies.
 
In my cocoon state, I watched others like me emerge from their cocoons and flutter towards the light. I wasn’t alone in the ocean. There were many others like me, floating aimlessly, waiting for that very chance to shine.
 
I tore the exterior of my cocoon shell, as I reached a tiny hand out into the open. I felt the atmosphere of warmth and love go through my fingers, deep into my veins, feeling me up with new found sensations that pulsated into my heart strings. I felt a new aliveness, that I was finally going to be liberated from the dark dream state of the enclosed cocoon.
 
I spread out my rainbow wings in full width, I fluttered my wings and flew towards the direction of the light, joining the butterflies in their warm loving embrace, mingling and munching in the dance of love.
 
Thank you, Fetlife.

The Scarlet Throne – Princess Cheryl Awakes

In the dark caverns there was nothing left. Not a sound, not any steps. Pure darkness shrouded me, and enveloped all my senses. In the distance I saw a flicker of light on top of the caverns. A flicker from the stars above. Glittery stars fell into sparkles of star dust into the caverns.  The chains melted away under the star dust, as I felt my arms and legs. The dust covered my naked body in glitter star powder. The wounds and red marks on my body started to heal as the healing dust went into my skin. It was a special kind of star dust, one that can magically heal and dissolve anything that it touches. The star dust reflected light around the caverns in sparkles. I felt for my hair. My hair had grown much longer since I last touched them. I felt for my face; it was smooth to touch. I felt for my knees, they were no longer numb. I stood up slowly, and carefully, as I had not stood for ages.

As I rose to stand, dawn broke. The sun started to rise from the distance. The large sun melted the caverns around me into a orange bright glow. The energy from the sun regenerated my veins, my blood started flowing through my body. I felt for the center of my chest for my heart beat, feeling the aliveness of being reborn. The orange glow from the sun melted the ground, as I was transported into another realm.

The new realm was filled with trees, star dust and sunlight. There was a castle, which was made of diamonds, with a marble white bridge arched over a flowing translucent rainbow river. By the river, was a knight in silver armour. He was kneeling on a knee, his head bowed low as I approached him.

“Princess Cheryl, you had arrived,”

“What is happening?”

“You had awoken, your knights await for your command,” he looked up at me with his dark brown eyes.

“What is your name?”

“Knight Damon.”

“Did you… save me?”

“Not at all,” he looked down at my feet. “The pleasure is not mine. You are the Princess, Cheryl. I am a lowly Knight, not deserving of any honour of mention. You had awoken from the darkness, for you believed in hope. I am filled with admiration for your courage. If you want to reach the Scarlet Throne, you have to conquer Risque. You have to control your darkness.

“You mean Risque and the Dark Lord who had me chained in the caverns?”

“Yes. I am sorry I wasn’t there to rescue you my Princess. I had waited all my life for this day that you will finally arrive. I am dutifully bound to serve you. The Dark Lord and minions did not recognise that you are needed to conquer the Scarlet Throne. You, Princess Cheryl, holds the key to the throne and all the hearts of the knights and minions in this kingdom of pain and pleasure.”

“I.. hold the key? How am I to conquer the throne?”Cheryl

“If you want to conquer the Scarlet Throne, you have to accept that you are both the Dark Queen Risque and Princess Cheryl.

“That’s impossible! I can never be the Dark Queen.”

“Your knights and minions await for that day. As of now, please take my key.”

He took out a golden key from the breast pocket inside his armour.

“Chain it to your heart, and remember that I, and all knights in your kingdom are bound to serve you for eternity in your quest to reach the Scarlet Throne.”

(to be continued)

The Scarlet Throne – The Dark Lord Appears

The Scarlet Throne Part 1 – The Dark Lord Appears

The sound of glorious trumpets echoed in the clouds as I walked on the red carpeted steps, towards a scarlet throne that hung mid in the skies. My royal red gown splattered with patches of dark blood. Intricate weaving of black lace flowed from the sleeves of the gown to the end of my palms… adorned and hid the scars on my arms.

I dragged a long broad sword up the steps. I wasn’t breathing normally. My chest was moving with the pulsing eccentric beat of my heart, but it was irregular. Sometimes I breathed, sometimes I didn’t. I climbed up the steps slowly, sometimes stopping to breathe… sometimes glancing up at the scarlet throne… which hung empty in mid air.

Moments before… I was in the cavern in the depths of hell… deep inside the earth where molten and smoke mixed and mingled into a smoky blind mess.

Once upon a time…Red Roses

My Scarlet Kingdom was a lovely place of love and hope. Our emblem was the red rose. Our people, were kind and gentle. We were self sufficient, depending on a sustenance of vegetables. We ate no meat, and we did not go to wars. We were a peaceful race. Simple folk that looked forward to rainbow skies after the rain. Our kingdom was known as the Kingdom of Love.

The Scarlet Throne was occupied by my grandmother, who had ruled the kingdom for eternity. She built the kingdom with a foundation of unconditional love. She gave freely, built orphanages and charities. She taxed the rich, and made them volunteer for a humble cause. She made sure that there were checks and balances, so no one had to suffer. There was abundance. There is enough. Our kingdom was glorious, and it was plentiful.

The Scarlet Throne was only passed down through a matriarchal line of female rulers. I knew one day, it would be my turn. I followed my grandmother wherever she went. I learnt her wisdom, her philosophy… her thoughts… till the day I turned sixteen.

On my sixteen birthday, a grand ball was organized… invites were sent to eligible princes throughout the galaxy. They came in floating carriages, in floating ships, in floating cars… they descended on the Scarlet Kingdom for the hand of the Princess.

It was on that fateful night on the dance floor… I met the Dark Lord.

He told me… he will bring me into his dark paradise… into a world where love and lust… pain and pleasure are one. A world where we can unite our kingdoms and take over the universe in our light and darkness.

He took me inside his cape, as he muffled my screams by forcing a vital of poison down my throat…. I remembered being transported in his floating carriage.. unable to move…

Into the dark caverns of his kingdom… where monsters lurked. I was chained up in the middle of the cavern… fully naked. I heard the sounds of laughter in the dark. I heard mocking whispers. I heard voices. I heard but could not see.

On my naked flesh, every night… I felt long tongues tightening my arms and legs… the rope like tongues… leaving traces of their sticky saliva… the foul smell of decomposed meat… they tasted me… they bit me… they ravaged my body… leaving scars… leaving marks… permanently… on my skin.

The Dark Lord never came back. He disappeared… as he left me there… as his chained prisoner. In my dreams I dreamt… a White Knight would rescue me from this hellish cavern and bring me back into his Kingdom of Light. On other nights, I sank deeper into a black hole… being sucked deeper and deeper no matter how much I tried to struggle free…

Till one day… a strange vision appeared in my dreams….

The Scarlet Throne Part 2 – The Capture

A strange vision appeared in my dreams…

In my dream, I was in a tiny cocoon, surrounded by many other cocoons like me, in a lush tropical forest. They were breathing in their enclosed white silk shells.

When I woke up… I only saw darkness in all directions. I felt a cloth around my head, around my ears. I felt my hands, that hung upwards with metal chains encasing my wrists. My knees were numb from the kneeling. The air smelt of decomposing meat. The laughter and voices echoed through the caverns, day after day, even in my sleep.

Memories2Everyday, the monsters would come… and if I tried to struggle free from the chains, I would be greeted with sharp slashes of whips on my back.. till I could no longer move. It must have been years. But every night I dreamt I was in that tiny cocoon.  Soon.. I gave up struggling. I gave up all hope. All… light… was removed from my blinded visions. Only the voices of mocking laughter remained.

One day I heard a familiar voice. It was the deep voice of the Dark Lord.

“My little crimson princess…” His breath caressed the open wounds on my skin, “have you been broken?”

“I don’t understand,” I answered. I listened to his footsteps, he was circling me, where I was… hanging naked.. kneeling on the cavern floor.

“You must be broken… for my desires…” he whispered to my ear… sending a wave of sensations down my spine…

“Whip her, continue.”

The monsters came again… this time… they were merciless. The whips came in full force… on my back.. on my legs… on my chest… every inch of my flesh was whipped by those thick long whips that crackled through the caverns in a howling cry.

It was the pain that shot through my head, then it was the numbness… then it all went blank… as I drifted into my dream again..

A little cocoon.. in a lush tropical forest…

 

The Scarlet Throne Part 3 – Master’s Toy

Darkness. The all familiar word. I am heading back there again. This time, there is no more light. No more… innocence.

Blood, lust and deceit. That is all it is, in this universe of pain.  The universe of pain mangled with twisted pleasures. For only through pain, one can feel the gratification of pleasure. They are one and the same. There is no answers to the lies, they are deceit. The lies he said, the happy ever after. The knight in white amour. No, there are no knights that are going to save me anymore. No saviours. No gods. No nothing.

No one can save me now. Master's Toy

I am falling deeper.

How deep, I could not tell, but this hole is so deep that it’s never ending, like a sink hole. One can never crawl out of.

Just falling even more deeper.

Into the swirling twirls of a hypnosis chanting of inaudible words. My cries, drowned out by the chanting, my thoughts, replaced by a void. The possession are chanting in riddles, but in these riddles, there is no sense of meaning in them. Just a trance, a trance like state. A toy. That’s what he was making me into, a toy… for his pleasure.

Master’s Toy

…was my new name.

It wasn’t Cheryl, or Risque. I was just an object. And if I had to refer to myself, there is no I.

There is only Master.

And “Toy”.

Master’s Toy.

His object of pleasure.

He could lift me up by my arm, like a puppet on strings. He could move me when he pleases, and I can’t move an inch. He can make me do all his bidding, and I can’t make a sound. Just a toy. Master’s Toy. A toy that he can keep in his safe. A toy that he can play with when he is bored. A toy that he can discard when he doesn’t want it anymore.

Master’s Toy.

A Master’s Toy is not allowed to think. It’s just an object. It has no thoughts. It cannot move. It’s immobile. It cannot speak. It is just a toy.
I had fallen.

The Duality of Scarlet Queen

I don’t think it is possible for Risque to exist without Cheryl.
And like wise.
Time and time again…

Screen Shot 2015-06-05 at 10.20.57 am
Countless of knights had fallen into Risque’s trap
Or Cheryl’s innocence.
Never acknowledging that we both exist together.

My Dark Vizer had advised…
There is always a blessing and curse of Lilith.

Pick only one, and you will find you will yearn for the other.

A trail of bloodied bodies of fallen Knights
Litter the long red carpet on the marble steps
Leading to the throne of the Scarlet Queen
In her Kingdom of Pain and Pleasure.

Will you be part of the fallen?

Mon Chevalier Noir (My Dark Knight)

Phantom Rose

He is an artist and architect
In his own underground dungeon
Filled with roses and candle lights
He sings a soulful opera
waiting for his Queen.

She arrives in her long furs
leather heels & black corset
Looking at him with her
intense sultry eyes.

He kneels and kisses the back of her hand
“You are mine” he says, before covering her
under his long cape. They make love
under the skies… with the stars
as their witness.